december 31st, 2015
I feel myself coming up after being pulled down under the tide. A tide that held me too close to wanting to be understood, Scared to really be fully me.
I can feel that I’m ready to really hear my truest self. I turned 38 a few days ago and it’s like a switch clicked and I see things a bit differently and it’s beautiful.
What I’m hearing… home school the youngest, help him to be is greatest self. Move on from dairy and sugar and wheat. Give my body the truest nutrients it’s been looking for and craving. Own my voice, my powerful observations, knowings, challenges and hopes. Dare others to dream big, listen to their knowing. Teach myself how to cook and serve good to nourish my family deeply and satisfyingly. Listen, learn, pray, dance. I feel myself not caring what “they” think. Wanting to speak up for what I know and have seen. To be able to stand proudly and confidently in me, not needing to prove anything just receive and learn and know and love. To own the greatness that is waiting for me.
All those times I’ve been shown that I need to be brave, stand up and really dive into my deepest strengths… I thought it was all about art… it’s about my body, my temple, my family, my mind. Trusting and forgiving myself as I learn and grow and try and fall and GET BACK UP.
I see 2016 as a year of learning, growing and feeling. Listening to the universe, my body, my children, my love. Serving with love, laughter and richness. Done are the endless conversations about money, tightening spending, lack, only so much. Instead I trust that abundance is already ours. That as I step into my calling fully that an abundance of money, love, good health and peacefulness will cradle us and saturate all that is already good.
I feel my best artwork is yet to come, more than just about the artwork.. I use the art as a tool a way for us to connect, to feel, to believe in what is unseen and not yet known. Artwork that helps us to transport into another part of our our mind, our life, our being, the world. To feel. Yet also growing as an artist and owning my craft, my skill. Allowing my skills to grow and myself to continue to develop, to play and not take it all too seriously while also knowing it’s the most real thing I know; a piece of me. A piece of what I’ve seen, a piece of what is coming that even I don’t know yet.
I’m breathing in the changes, the healing, the love. Praying for courage to answer the call on why I’m here on earth at this exact time, with these exact people in my exact life; including you who are reading this. Breathing in and owning the wisdom that has come from all my mistakes, shortcomings, past tries and successes.
For 2016 I feel an allowing happening. listening. a transformation.
Has anything been trying to get your attention? Are you feeling changes coming or a deeper settling in what you already know to be true? I wish you an incredible beginning to 2016!